on the necessity of mental respite

me: gleegleegleegleegleegleeglee

dad, bewildered: seriously, how can you watch this show?*

mom, magnanimous: oh, leave her be. she needs this. she spends all day writing about wars... and churches.

* this from a man who very much looked forward to watching 2012, enjoyed all the action/destructo sequences, but audibly (read: sarcastically) sniffed whenever there was a tender (read: uber-cheesy) scene.

on very rough drafts

mom: you wouldn't believe his paragraph even if you read it. it was a cabbage! i gave them plenty of time to work in the library. i said, "if you want to show me your work and get some feedback before your final submission, you can." and still - a boot!

me: wait, is it a boot or a cabbage?

mom: he is a boot; his paragraph is a cabbage.

on punctuation

mom: wake up and smell the colons!

students: [blank stares]

mom: that didn't come out right.